My CEO 156
156 Facing Therapy
(Winona)
Dr. Barnaby Greyson, M.D., Ph.D.
Consultant Psychiatrist and Psychoanalyst
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Guiding the Minds Behind the Headlines
| hover outside his office door, reading the nover and over. This is it. My nerves are toast. My hands clammy
and my heart rate like a racehorse who just finished a steeplechase.
| look at Jayden besideand he looks exactly like | feel.
His eyes meet mine. "We got this."
| nod. "We got this."
We step inside together and a receptionist asks us to take a seat after she takes our names.
We both sit in silence. I'm sure the clock on the wall is on high volas the seconds tick over.
Then out he steps. He's younger than | imagined. Not even any gray kissing his hair. I'm not sure he's much older
than us. Maybe he has a good hair colorist and does Botox or something.
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He nods at us, peering over his glasses like he is actually one hundred years old. This is weird.
We stood up and walked into his room. "Take a seat," he says as he sits in his huge leather office chair.
It's more luxurious than | expected in here, with plush chairs and a soothing earthy color palette. imagined stark,
clinical walls and a hard, brown sofa for sreason.
We sit down across from Dr. Barnaby, the silence stretching out like a taut wire ready to snap.
| have no clue what to say.
I'd
| feel exposed under his scrutiny as he looks from Jayden toand back again. He nods his head like he can see
all the mess insideI've kept hidden.
Maybe I'll explode and blurt out everything at once.
"Good morning." Dr. Greyson's voice is deep and calm as he gets straight to the point.
"Today, we begin the process of unraveling what's brought you both here. By the media reports, you both should
already be in padded cells..."
| stare at him.
Then a huge grin takes over his staid face. "But that's why you paythe big bucks. | wish | could say you're
the worst cases I've had but sadly not. I think you're saveable. Maybe."
I'm really not sure if | should laugh or cry. Doing both will likely getthat padded room.
"Relax folks." He holds his hands up in the air and lowers them again.
"Dr. Greyson..." Jayden starts but is interrupted.
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156 Facing Therapy
"CallBarnaby. If you knew Dr. Greyson, my father, you'd understand."
| raise my eyebrows in surprise.
"What? Just because I'm the best psychiatrist in the country, arguably the world, doesn't mean | don't have
father issues. Sure as hell never going to be one myself. That parenting shit is fucked up."
| can't help but laugh at him this time. Jayden does too!
In fact, the three of us laugh together until Barnaby stops and stares right at us both in turn, his voice dead
serious, "this isn't going to be easy. But it is possible."
| stop laughing and glance at Jayden, searching his face for ssign of how he's feeling. | wonder if he's as
confused as | am right now. Not sure what | was expecting but it wasn't this. Jayden looks at me, and yes, he is
just as thrown off as | am.
"Before we start, | want you both to know that this space is safe. You can say whatever you need to say without
fear of judgment. But | also want to be clear-this is not a place for games or passive aggression. If we're doing
this, we need honesty. Brutal, uncomfortable honesty."
| stiffen at the word "brutal." It sounds so final, so unforgiving. I'm not sure I'm ready for that, but then again,
when have | ever been ready for any of this?
My adult life has been a whirlwind of events that I've barely had tto process-Jayden's amnesia, Abby's
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmhealth, Judy's manipulations, Ashlyn's metal health problems.
And now, therapy with the man | once loved without argument, the man who broke my heart, and yet the man
I'm desperately trying to hold onto.
But I'm Jayden speaks first, his voice clipped. "I'm here because | want to fix things-for Abby, and for us. not
going to pretend I'm not angry, or that I'm not hurt. There's a lot of stuff we need to get into, and I don't know if
we'll be able to fix all of it."
His words hithard, but | nod. He's right-we're both carrying so much anger and pain. But hearing him say it
out loud, that he's not sure we can fix it, makes the anxiety bubble up insidelike a volcano ready
to erupt.
| want to scream, to cry, to tell him that I'm terrified we won't make it. But | don't. Instead, | swallow that
reaction down and keep my tone steady. It's not that | don't want to voice my emotions, | just want to do it in the
right way.
-I'm
here because | need to understand where we stand." | say, my hands clenching in my lap. "I don't want to keep
going around in circles. | want to find a way forward, whatever that looks like."
Barnaby nods, his gaze shifting between us. "It's clear that there's a lot of unresolved issues between you both.
Anger, hurt, mistrust-these are all things we'll need to address."
"Yes. | just don't know how we address them when we always end up in meltdown mode," | say.
"The first step is getting to a place of acknowledgement, exploring these feelings. Realizing they may cfrom
things that happened before the two of you even met."
I swallow hard.
157 Going Deep